I've been feeling "changeable" recently. Overwhelmingly I feel distracted.
There is something that I was going to consider, google, or do.
I just can't quite put my finger on what it was.
It is preventing me from getting anything done.
Nor can I relax.
So, here we are. It is time to sit down, sift through my thoughts, and get a grip...
A month ago I had an operation to remove my ovaries.
- The purpose of the surgery was cancer risk reduction, and I feel great that I've finally taken that step. Phew.
- On the other hand I'm still waiting to find out whether there were any signs of cancer in the removed tissue. En garde.
I've been waiting for the menopausal symptoms to kick in. As yet I haven't had anything obvious like a hot flush.
- I spoke with my GP a couple of days ago, and he was of the opinion that surgical menopause symptoms hit fast, so if they haven't arrived yet then I may not get get any. Whoopee.
- Though I wonder whether perhaps hormone changes are causing my unsettled mind? Pooh.
Changes are afoot at work. There's a project coming up soon that will absorb quite a bit of my time, resulting in a temporary increase in daytime hours, and reduction in evening hours. Overall my hours will go up for a month or two.
- On the one hand I'm looking forward to a boost in my take home pay. Yum yum.
- Conversely I'll have less free time and more stress. Hum ho.
Beyond the project phase there is likely to be a new role opening up which my manager would like me to take. It will mean dropping the evening & weekend role, and doing daytime hours. The total hours will be about the same. The role I'd be dropping is term-time only, whereas the new role is all year round.
- I'll earn more with a steady year round income and it will be easier to manage. Yipee.
- I'll miss my lazy summers. Boo.
- Daytime parking would be either more hassle or more expensive. Pah.
- I'll get my evenings and weekends back. Meh.
- I won't be able to potter in the garden during the day. Humbug.
- Visiting dad and walking the dogs will need to be finished in time to get to work. Oh.
- The work will be more interesting. Hmmm.
- There may be more stress. Errr.
- I'm not sure if I'll have more or less job & pay security. Sheesh.
Why am I surprised that I'm distracted?